Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
