You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
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