when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Quick, to the slutcave!
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Randomize
