Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
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