I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
this hospital has no fireball
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
