No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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