What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Randomize