I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
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