I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
