I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
