In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize