We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
