I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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