Too much gin, very little bucket
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
Randomize