is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
