Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Randomize
