my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
