remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I should be sponsored by Trojan
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Randomize
