I'm gonna have a badass scar
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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