I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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