I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
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