oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
