Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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