Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize