dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
