i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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