I want to stick my p in your. b.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize
