I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
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