does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
They took my balls.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Randomize
