She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
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