Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
