I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Everything about him screamed your future.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
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