Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(301): View more from Maryland

Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.

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(909): View more from California

grandma shit on top of the toilet

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.

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(810): View more from Michigan

My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."

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(917): View more from New York City

my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce

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(919): View more from North Carolina

we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best

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(518): View more from New York

Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.

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(956): View more from Texas

I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!

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