But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Randomize
