Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize