I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
Life is so much better after having sex.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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