16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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