real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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