ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
