he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Randomize
