I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
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