theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
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