All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Randomize
