He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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