she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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