just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Randomize
