You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
