Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Randomize
