I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
