new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
