I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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