So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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